Again... transcribing about 3 pages of text messages about girls and all the emotions that come with them! At this point in time, 16 years old, Jake is completely terrified of girls and how they make his body feel. He asks why girls make his stomach feel jittery... he can't control it. Everything comes back to control.
Also know, these texts about girls stem from heartbreaks he had in 3rd grade and 9th. This misinterpretation of signals and cues from girls, did a number on his heart. He is doing what we all do... protecting his heart. --Jenn
When I think about girls, I just lose control. Pretty painted nails and long hair make my stomach wiggle around and my heart go fast. When I get overwhelmed by these emotions I have to let it out. I scream-sing a song about the Cookie Monster and a couple girls who make me upset. Many think I'm being a class clown and being goofy person but my autism doesn't let me make sense of these feelings. I just cannot help it so I scream.
Sometimes I scream her name too. Everyone in my class knows her name. I'm not a bad person or a teenager "playing games". I'm scared of these emotions.
Girls started getting me upset in 2nd grade. Sometimes I think they should put girls in jail and keep them away from me. Maybe I need to go away alone because I'm handsome and scared. I'm going to be famous. Girls will like me ... and that is scary. I don't know what to do. Sometimes I stare.
Sometimes I yell the names of the people who have made me upset and the girls names too. I even do it during school. I am not trying to violate their privacy. If they or anyone sees me screaming the names and tell me to stoop, I will lose more control and sing more! I might become disorderly or dangerous and hope police will understand. Man police might understand this.
I need to leave and take breaks.
The emotions that come with girls are scary, confusing and make me out of control. I do hope to be married one day tho.