Q & A with a Super Hero:
Dysregulation and Calming Down
8/12/14
Tell me about your hardest struggle right now, during out-of-school time.
Following directions, respecting others, staying safe.
Why is it hard to stay safe right now?
Because I don’t get my way.
You don’t always get your way… what’s different?
Well, we’re at a different place.
Do you mean at home or your body is in a different growing place?
Growing place.
How do you know your body is growing?
Because I’m out of control and getting big.
What does it feel like to be out of control?
Not too good. Bad. It’s not safe.
Does your brain feel different?
Yes.
How?
It’s changing.
How do you know it’s changing?
It’s telling your (my) body to do different things.
Like what?
Be wild, jump up and down and be crazy.
Is it hard to not listen to your brain?
Hit people. (still on previous question)
How do you stop yourself when your brain is telling you to do unsafe things?
I just do what my body feels like.
What if your body feels like running out of the house?
I don’t run out of the house anymore, I usually ride my bicycle.
How does that make you feel?
Happy and free.
Does it make your body feel different?
Alone.
Is alone good?
Yes.
Why?
Well, because when I don’t get my way, I like to be alone.
Do you need to be alone so you feel safe?
Yes…
Or just so you don’t see me…
Yes, I don’t like to see you when I’m in trouble. And I’m super strong on my bike.
Why don’t you like to see mommy’s face when you are in trouble?
Because she scares me.
What part?
The yelling noise and bringing me to my room for consequences.
What about my face?
Not good.
I hide from you when I’m (you're) telling you (me) serious things.
Does my mad mouth upset you or my mad eyes?
Mad eyes.
What do my mad eyes say?
Ggggggggrrrrrrrr!!!!!! Like a loud noise…
When your brain is telling you to run or hurt the dog, or mommy, how do you stop yourself?
Well. I stop myself by calling myself into the room until I get back to normal.
Is it hard to get back to normal/calm when you are angry?
Yes.
What do you do?
I hear the sump pump…
What do you do to get yourself calm in your room?
Take deep breaths and stuff like that.
Do you yell?
Yes.
Do you swear?
Yes, sometimes.
What else do you do?
Then I go in the dark and close my eyes. Sometimes it feels better to rip up feelings papers and write bad words in my journal. Like RIP and SOS and stuff teachers don’t like.
Anything else you want to say about feeling out of control?
When I’m out of control sometimes I want to watch inappropriate videos.
Not any more buddy—YouTube is gone!
Yes. I know. They are probably in jail. I don’t want to go to jail. I want to be careful. But mom, I can do it.
Do you like your brain?
Yes. Hey mom, will youtube be back next year? In 2015? January? February?
Why do you want to watch things that are unsafe for your brain?
I like to not focus on my self and look at other people sometimes.
Even if they are doing unsafe things?
Yes, I like seeing people get in trouble. I stay calm and watch them. I laugh at that it’s like a laughing movie.
Dysregulation and Calming Down
8/12/14
Tell me about your hardest struggle right now, during out-of-school time.
Following directions, respecting others, staying safe.
Why is it hard to stay safe right now?
Because I don’t get my way.
You don’t always get your way… what’s different?
Well, we’re at a different place.
Do you mean at home or your body is in a different growing place?
Growing place.
How do you know your body is growing?
Because I’m out of control and getting big.
What does it feel like to be out of control?
Not too good. Bad. It’s not safe.
Does your brain feel different?
Yes.
How?
It’s changing.
How do you know it’s changing?
It’s telling your (my) body to do different things.
Like what?
Be wild, jump up and down and be crazy.
Is it hard to not listen to your brain?
Hit people. (still on previous question)
How do you stop yourself when your brain is telling you to do unsafe things?
I just do what my body feels like.
What if your body feels like running out of the house?
I don’t run out of the house anymore, I usually ride my bicycle.
How does that make you feel?
Happy and free.
Does it make your body feel different?
Alone.
Is alone good?
Yes.
Why?
Well, because when I don’t get my way, I like to be alone.
Do you need to be alone so you feel safe?
Yes…
Or just so you don’t see me…
Yes, I don’t like to see you when I’m in trouble. And I’m super strong on my bike.
Why don’t you like to see mommy’s face when you are in trouble?
Because she scares me.
What part?
The yelling noise and bringing me to my room for consequences.
What about my face?
Not good.
I hide from you when I’m (you're) telling you (me) serious things.
Does my mad mouth upset you or my mad eyes?
Mad eyes.
What do my mad eyes say?
Ggggggggrrrrrrrr!!!!!! Like a loud noise…
When your brain is telling you to run or hurt the dog, or mommy, how do you stop yourself?
Well. I stop myself by calling myself into the room until I get back to normal.
Is it hard to get back to normal/calm when you are angry?
Yes.
What do you do?
I hear the sump pump…
What do you do to get yourself calm in your room?
Take deep breaths and stuff like that.
Do you yell?
Yes.
Do you swear?
Yes, sometimes.
What else do you do?
Then I go in the dark and close my eyes. Sometimes it feels better to rip up feelings papers and write bad words in my journal. Like RIP and SOS and stuff teachers don’t like.
Anything else you want to say about feeling out of control?
When I’m out of control sometimes I want to watch inappropriate videos.
Not any more buddy—YouTube is gone!
Yes. I know. They are probably in jail. I don’t want to go to jail. I want to be careful. But mom, I can do it.
Do you like your brain?
Yes. Hey mom, will youtube be back next year? In 2015? January? February?
Why do you want to watch things that are unsafe for your brain?
I like to not focus on my self and look at other people sometimes.
Even if they are doing unsafe things?
Yes, I like seeing people get in trouble. I stay calm and watch them. I laugh at that it’s like a laughing movie.